Girl: Hi

Boy: Hi

Girl: Did you eat?

Boy: Did you eat?

Girl: Are you copying me?

Boy: Are you copying me?

Girl: I love you

Boy: Yeah I ate already!

Man: Have I seen you somewhere before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down here
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Interviewer: Give an example of a difficult scenario and how you handled it. Me: I poured a bowl of cereal, but had no milk. So I used ice cream.
Interviewer: You task risks. We like that. Your hired.

Bitch, You're so ugly hello kitty said goodbye

I think of you when I'm lonely. Then, I'm content to be alone.

Freind: your a dick

Me: at least I can use it

(Sittin in class and you pull out your phone)
Teacher- Young man give me your phone!!
Me- Bitch, when u start payin the damn bills on my phonecthen you can tell me what to do wit it. Ohk? Bye.

Daughter: "Dad, a kid at school called me a lesbian."
Dad: "Smack her in the mouth and kick her in the vagina."
Daughter: "But dad she is cute."
Dad: ...

*Kid shows middle finger to other kid* Kid: "Wow you finally took that finger out of your ass?"

I'll kiss you in the rain so you'll get twice as wet.