One girl was getting raped and she threatened to call the cops he said ok go ahead let's see who cums first

Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore - my face should be among them.

Let's have a party and invite your pants to come on down.

Me: Hey girl can you spell the word me?
Girl: Yes I can, M-E, Me.
Me: you forgot the D.
Girl: There's no D in "Me".
Me: Not yet...

Are you good with kids?

Cause I'm about to turn your mouth into a day care.

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence

What's a rapist's favorite day? hump day

another name for a vagina is a cockpit

A kid went to the police department to report about his stolen bicycle.
OFFICER: Are you suspicious about anyone who would steal it?
KID: My parents, I guess. Because in the night I heard dad saying:
"Hump on it before Derek wakes up!"

Whats the difference between a dead prostitute and your job?
Your job still sucks.