Q: What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman?
A: You can unscrew the lightbulb, but you can't unscrew the pregnant woman.

Guy:" Wanna here a joke about my penis?"
Girl:"ok"
Guy:Gross you f*cking pervert why do you want to hear a joke about my penis?"
Girl:"Cause It will be to short XD

Let's settle this argument like adults.
In the bedroom, naked.

How are priests and McDonalds hamburgers the same? They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns

A girl and a boy are in a room. The boy asks the girl if she has any irish in her. She says no. He begins to take off his pants and says
"Ya want some"

I hear if a woman has a tongue ring, she'll probably suck your dick, and if a guy has a tongue ring... he'll probably suck your dick too.

there will be 8 planets left.
after i destroy URANUS.

No YouPorn... I do not want to play poker, I'm at work.

guy 1: do you like dragons?

guy 2: yea/no why?

guy 1: cause imma be dragon my balls all over your face!

When I said I like it rough I was talking about the sex. Not the whole entire relationship.