Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:24 in Short  Favorites
Boy: You like bad boys, right?
Girl: Yeah.
Boy: Well, I don't mean to brag or anything, but I went on DisneyChannel.com without my parents permission!
Girl: *Sarcastic* Wow, whatta bad boy, what's next, not doing your homework on purpose?
Boy: Hold on, girl, I'm getting there.
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:22 in Short  Favorites
Yo mama so Short She hang glides on a dorito
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:22 in Short  Favorites
Ralph was driving home one evening when he suddenly realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present.

He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that Barbie in the window?"

"Which Barbie?" the clerk says.

"We have Barbie goes to the gym, barbie goes nightclubbing, barbie goes to the ball, barbie goes shopping, and barbie goes to the beach. Each for $19.95. And Barbie gets divorced for $265.00."

Ralph asks, "Why does Divorced Barbie cost $265.00?"

"That's obvious" the saleslady says. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, Ken's furniture, Ken's money..."
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:18 in Short  Favorites
What's the difference between a hare and a rabbit?

You can pull a hair out of your arse but not a rabbit
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:17 in Short  Favorites
Note to self: Its time to grow up, be responsible, and act like an adult. Self to note: Shut the f*ck up...
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:16 in Short  Favorites
___/\___________\o/______ Swim little guy!!! Swim from the shark!!!
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:15 in Short  Favorites
YOU HAVE BEEN HIT BY .…….|\ ……..| \ ……..|_\ _____l__________ .\___ A BOAT___/ ...\___________/ CAME OUTTA NOWHERE!
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:15 in Short  Favorites
Why was the tomato so slow? Because it couldn't ketchup.
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:14 in Short  Favorites
Your IQ is so low, you have to dig for it!
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Uploaded on 2014.01.06 02:06:14 in Short  Favorites
The General Rule of People you meet on the internet (only pick two):
-Single -Attractive -Mentally Stable
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