Me: How many teeth do cats have

Friend: I don't know

Me: How many feet do chickens have

Friend: Two

Me: Looks like you know more about cock more than pussy

Friend: Fuck you ????

A boy walked into the classroom. The teacher looked at him. "Where were you?" The teacher asked.

"On top of Blueberry Hill." The boy answered.

Another boy came in a few minutes later. "Where were you?" The teacher asked.

"On top of Blueberry Hill." The boy answered.

A few minutes later, a girl came in. "Lemme guess, you were on top of Blueberry Hill too." The teacher said.

"No, I am Blueberry Hill." The girl answered.

CNN just said the world is forty trillion dollars in debt. Who the f*ck does the world owe? Jupiter?

I told my girlfriend that my mom is old so she needs to speak slowly and loud. Then I told my mom my girlfriend is retarded. They have no idea!

Add a word to ruin a movie:

- Batman Begins College

- The Longest Yard Sale

- Charlottes Web Cam.

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Boy: Hey Beautiful, Can I have your number?
Girl: No, I have a boyfriend.
Boy: But I'm gay, can I have the number now?
Girl: Oh, okay! Here's the number.
Boy: Thanks, I'm not really gay. Ha!
Girl: That's my boyfriends number.

How we wake up I'm the morning:
Brain: "Oh f*ck."
Body: "Don't get up."
Dick: "THIS IS SPARTAA!!!"

Boy : Marry me.. ?
Girl: Do you have a house..?
Boy : No..
Girl: Do you have a BMW car.. ?
Boy : No..
Girl: How much is your salary.. ?
Boy : No salary.. but,..
Girl: No but. You have nothing.. How can i
marry you.??
Leave please.!
Boy: (talk to himself) I have one villa, 3
property lands, 3 Ferrari, 2Porsche.. Why I
still need to buy BMW.?! How can I get the
salary when actually I am the BOSS

*boy whispers to his mom during a wedding*

boy: "Mommy?"

mom: "What?"

boy: "Why is the girl dressed in white?"

mom: "Because this is the happiest day of her life."

boy: "... so why is the boy dressed in black?"

What is the lightest thing in the world?
A penis…even a thought can raise it.