What gets longer when pulled, fits between breasts, inserts neatly in a hole, and works best when jerked?
A Seatbelt

Roses are red,
That much is true,
But violets are purple,
Not f*cking blue.

Roses are red, poems are corny, take me to bed I'm feeling horny. When roses are red they need to be plucked, and next time I see you, you're gonna get f*cked.

why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

knock knock

Who's there?

Not Sally