Chuck Norris once ate twenty 72oz steaks in one hour. He spent the first fifty minutes having sex with the waitress.

Chuck Norris hates Kickass Humor, he thinks this site underestimates him.

you have lost your mind before you hit Chuck Norris...
you have lost your life after you hit Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris shits with such Velocity that he doesn't need to flush.

When chuck norris dropped his wallet a kid picked it up known as bill gates today.

Chuck Norris can surf the internet, literally.

The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee...with his breath.

Earth used to be 1 land form, until Chuck Norris changed that

chuck norris once had a lemonade stand



a nerdy kid came up and said you should of made a grape juice stande

he is now known as stephen hawking

Chuck Norris doesn’t swim, he beats the water into submission.