*texting a friend*
Me: Hey what's up?
Friend: NOthiNg MucH.
Me: Um, ok. Did you hear about the new kid?
Friend: YeAH hE's iN mY sEcoND HoUr.
Me: dude, I think your cap locks is having a seizure.
Friend: nO iT'S nOt.
Me: Check again, and this time actually look at your phone, not your dick. It's never gonna grow long enough.